


Broken Dreams

by KaytheJay



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Angst, Heartbreak, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:28:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23371684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaytheJay/pseuds/KaytheJay
Summary: Aziraphale needs to talk to Crowley.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens)
Kudos: 6





	Broken Dreams

Aziraphale took a deep breath. This was a long time coming. He probably should have done it sooner. It wasn’t fair to Crowley to make him think that things were going well when they just weren’t.  
“Crowley, darling,” Aziraphale said sheepishly, “There’s something we must,” Aziraphale took another deep breath. “Something that we have to discuss.” Crowley looked up from his computer.  
“What’s the matter, Angel?” Aziraphale smiled sadly and walked over to sit beside Crowley. He closed his eyes and took Crowley’s hand.  
“I can’t do this anymore,” Aziraphale said. Crowley looked taken aback and put his laptop down.  
“What do you mean you can’t do this anymore? Is everything ok?”  
“Obviously not, Crowley, or we wouldn’t be having this discussion,” Aziraphale snapped. He sighed. “Sorry.” Crowley ran his hand down Aziraphale’s thigh. Aziraphale flinched before removing Crowley’s hand. “It’s just-” Aziraphale shook his head. “I have lost everything to be here with you,” he said. He looked Crowley in the eyes before quickly turning away. “At first I thought it was worth it. Life was fantastic and I was happy.” Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s hand. “But now I’m missing the bustle of having that constant rush of having an assignment. My life feels empty without it.”  
“Angel, you’re not the only one who was outcasted. I don’t have my people anymore either. I stopped having assignments and the only miracles I perform are for you.” Aziraphale shook his head.  
“I know. And that’s why we should have ended things earlier.” He sniffled. “I never meant to let things get this out of hand.” He looked at Crowley. “We are on our own now due to our stupidity.” The angel said something under his breath that Crowley didn’t quite catch. “I knew what would happen if I let this happen. And I let it happen nonetheless. Maybe if I get out of here, Heaven will take me back.”  
“Don’t speak that nonsense,” Crowley said softly. “You know that they wouldn’t take you back. They’ll never be able to trust you again.” Aziraphale let the tears slip from his eyes. “I could put you through hellfire myself and Hell wouldn’t take me back.” Crowley ran his fingers through Aziraphale’s hair. “It’s hard. It’s really hard. I know. I’m doing everything I can to make this easier on the both of us but I just don’t know anymore.”  
“That’s precisely the problem,” Aziraphale said. “My life has lost all purpose without having assignments and having to keep you out of trouble and doing the work for the ineffable plan.” Crowley kissed Aziraphale’s cheekbone.  
“Don’t say that, Love. Your life has lots of meaning.” Crowley wiped the tears from Aziraphale’s eyes. “Thanks to you, the world didn’t end and the Great War didn’t happen as it was supposed to.” Aziraphale shook his head.  
“I’m afraid that the credit for that one goes to Adam,” Aziraphale replied. “If Adam hadn’t fought his calling we all would be sitting in a pile of rubbish right now.”  
“Warlock then,” Crowley said. “You helped me to raise Warlock. Look at what a fine young man he turned out to be. Thanks to your heavenly influence.”  
“I suppose he turned out to be fine,” Aziraphale said. “But that’s all he gets is fine because of your demonic influence.”  
“I was only doing my job, Aziraphale,” Crowley said. Aziraphale stood up.  
“Exactly. You are a demon. I am an angel. This never should have happened to begin with and I won’t allow it to go any further.” Crowley stood and wrapped his arms around Aziraphale but the angel shook him off. “Don’t touch me. Don’t even look at me until I figure out what comes next in a life without you.”  
“Angel-”  
“Don’t angel me, Crowley. You know that what is best for us is for us to split and never see each other again.” Aziraphale shook his head. “Just leave me alone, please Crowley. You’re making this harder than it has to be.”  
“This doesn't have to be anything!” Crowley said out of desperation. “You don’t have to leave. What about our side? Us against everybody else?” Crowley reached out for Aziraphale’s hand but he snatched it away before Crowley got the chance. “Don’t leave me,” Crowley begged. “I can’t do it without you.” Aziraphale looked over his shoulder. Crowley had collapsed on the floor, his glasses tossed aside. Tears slipping down his face.  
“I must be strong,” Aziraphale whispered to himself. “I must-”  
“Aziraphale, please,” came Crowley’s voice, shaking and broken. Aziraphale turned fully to face Crowley. He knew he shouldn’t be giving into this nonsense. He knew that it was going to hurt Crowley if he did this. Why was he so surprised at how much it was hurting him? He shook his head at himself but kneeled down beside Crowley anyway. He hated how much it was hurting Crowley. And, he had to admit, he was feeling rather sad at the thought of leaving Crowley behind as well. He sighed.  
“Chin up darling,” Aziraphale said. “I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered. Crowley nearly knocked him over with the force of his hug. Crowley melted into Aziraphale’s arms and wiped his face on the angel’s shirt.  
“Promise me to never do that to me again,” Crowley demanded. Aziraphale hated making promises. He lived forever and he could never promise that he’d never do something.  
Besides maybe in this one case. He had only wanted to leave in the first place on the slim chance that Heaven would take him back. Why would he want heaven when he had Crowley? He shook his head at himself. Leaving Crowley would have been the biggest mistake of his life.  
“I promise,” Aziraphale whispered back.

**Author's Note:**

> Hits and kudos mean the world to me. Comments fuel me into next week.   
> Find me on Tumblr @justanangelandhisdemon


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